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This is fucking ridiculous! What’s wrong with you? All that training for what?

                                    -Eddie Chambers trainer implores his fighter to show a little effort after the sixth round of Saturday’s snooze fest 

You fighting like you don’t want to fight!

                                    -Chambers trainer, after the seventh, with what should become a classic line 

Are you listening? You have to fight! Are you listening?

                                    -Chambers corner after the ninth 

There’s no way he should be going no twelve rounds…but you won’t let your punches go! You don’t need another bullshit decision!

                                    -Emmanuelle Steward pleading with Vladimir Klitschko to finish Chambers before the last round (Vladimir scored a knockout with seconds left in the last round when Chambers collapsed from boredom). 

American Heavyweight Eddie Chambers made some modifications to his style this afternoon. Instead of moving, he opted to stand in front of Klitschko. He also decided not to throw punches, a strange strategy for a boxing match. He appeared surprised at Vitali’s size, again, puzzling because, well, the younger Klitschko is quite well known. And they met at the weigh-in.

Eddies strategy of no movement and no activity evidently left him exhausted as he was breathing hard by the fifth round.

This was not a compelling fight.  It was an embarrassment.

Eddie Chambers is likely the best active American boxer. And he is harmless; a pudgy, indifferent, feather punching slug.

Klitschko fighting a large chocolate bunny would have offered more entertaining possibilities.

The death of American heavyweight boxing has been apparent for years. Fat, bleary, brain addled Riddick Bowe may now have claims as the best Heavyweight in the United States. Joe Frazier, sans his little toe (removed in a lawn mower accident) and approaching seventy, would probably be ranked in the top ten. It’s that bad, that ridiculous.

The upside? Thanks to technology, no one has to pay for this crap anymore!