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GRID IRON..it may be a product of advanced age, or whatever, but I’m finding it easier to wager quietly on the web and avoid bar bets or pools. A pool that finished at the end of the NFL season still has not paid me what I’m owed. Crazy. It’s a pricey pool and they are adamant that the entry fee be paid on time. Now, they’re not returning my e-mails. Listen mofo’s, keep the freakin’ money, you obviously need it allot more than I do and, in the immortal words of Samuel Jackson, I got something for my money. I learned all I need to learn about you…last time I wagered with a friend, a not insignificant amount, he offered to pay me 20% about a month after the event…no, I couldn’t tell you what he’s up to these days…I lose, I pay, period…I’m far more concerned about the status of Kevin and Pat Williams than that of Percy Harvin. The Minnesota Vikings can win without Harvin, I’m not sure they can if even one of the Williams is missing. Without both? Game over for the Vikes…the Vikes defensive line accounted for an outstanding 38 of their 48 sacks in 2009…the Dallas Morning News is reporting that deceased steroids dealer David Jacobs provided information to the NFL in 2008 detailing his supplier relationship with Michael Vick while the QB was in Atlanta. Jacobs committed suicide (not death by pit-bull, surely?) and the NFL is expected, according to the paper, to let the matter wither…the Chicago Bears are reportedly talking to Mike Martz about their offensive coordinator position. Martz was the architect of the “greatest show on turf” while in St Louis…Arizona Cardinal Anquan Boldin will be available for a relatively cheap price this off-season. The Bears could start in worse places as they look to provide the unfairly smeared Jay Cutler with potent weapons… the NFL Network is reporting Tim Tebow is currently graded as a third round pick. He’ll likely be selected by an incompetent organization (Bills? Raiders?) and will be an utterly wasted pick. NFL’s not him but I hear they still love his brand of football in Saskatchewan…Mrs Roy Williams of the Dallas Cowboys is due to make 12.9 million for the 2010 season. Williams is virtually irrelevant to the Cowboys scheme but, apparently, will be back at that astronomical price…LeDainian Tomlinson is not only finished as a San Diego Charger, he’s also likely done as a starting running back…

ICE..it was completely out of character for Chris Osgood of the Detroit Red Wings to publicly complain about a lack of playing time. Osgood has been supplanted by Jimmy Howard (and, man, that must sting) and the goalie took it upon himself to remind coach Mike Babcock just who it was that carried his Wings to the Cup finals the past two years. Osgood is already apologizing but the goalie, among the most maligned in history, might finally be expressing outrage over a career which has seen him pick up three Stanley Cup rings yet virtually no acclaim. If the Red Wings had won the Cup last year, the general consensus is that Osgood would have received the playoff MVP award…last year, Osgood was outplayed by Ty Conklin all season long but found his very best form as the playoffs began. That fairy tale turn of events seems doubtful this season, with the Monsters of Motown struggling to even qualify for Lord Stanley’s post season bash…Conklin, currently of the St Louis Blues, gets more attention these days for his huge handlebar moustache than he does for his goaltending exploits… Boston goalie Tuukka Rask is 0-3 with an .889 save percentage in his last three games. Tim Thomas should reassert himself in the Bruins goal as Rask suffers a midseason slump…the Atlanta Thrashers have ten unrestricted free agents on their roster. While it appears likely the Thrashers will have to move Ilya Kovalchuk before the trade deadline, GM Don Waddell has numerous other challenges and considerations before March rolls around. This is not going to end well for the southern deadweights…Brad Boyes of the St Louis Blues appeared to have emerged as a bona fide sniper after potting 76 goals in the last two seasons. This year the former Leaf has a paltry ten goals and currently sulks on the Blues third line…the Anaheim Ducks power play hits at a robust 24% with Teemu Selanne in the line-up. Absent the Finn, the Ducks strike at an anemic 12% rate…it was Jaroslav Halak in goal last night as the Montreal Canadiens recorded a rare win over Martin Brodeur. To an objective observer, a rarity in Montreal, Halak appears a better goalie than Carey Price. The solution? The Habs are likely to move Halak…

PUG LIFE..I remember reading how junior middleweight champ Kassim Ouma was such a hard worker in the gym that he would often vomit after a particularly tough session. Nothing is as it seems. Turns out Ouma was an alcoholic that handlers struggled to keep sober. Ouma has lost five of his last six fights and is slipping below even stepping stone status. Big money is long gone and someday he may have regrets…if you watched Saturday afternoon fights in the eighties you will likely remember Rocky Lockridge. The American junior lightweight won a title with a first round knockout of Roger Mayweather and also featured in brawls with the likes of Eusebio Pedroza, Julio Caesar Chavez and Wilfredo Gomez. It was recently reported that Lockridge is drug addled and homeless, a piece of boxing detritus roaming the streets of New Jersey…

RANDOM..is Venus not looking, well, Serena-like, at the Australian Open? Venus looks h u g e, with monster thighs and ripped forearms. Is cynicism the language of the day? Could Venus be opting to change her daily vitamin regimen in order to catch up to her sis?…nope, not feeling Bill Simmons these days. First, his fellatial treatment of LeBron was so over the top as to be cringe inducing, and now he’s smacked tiny, little Prince for his freshly penned Minnesota Viking cheer song, “Purple and Gold”. The songs a hoot, I mean, it’s written as a fun football anthem, not as an additional track for Purple Rain, and should be seen for what it is. Simmons is having a hard time recently portraying the always passionate sports doofus while managing the realities of his life, that of a middle aged family man. Like any star, I expect Simmons to snap out of his slump soon…