Entries from December 2009

Wednesday, December 9th, 2009

Heavyweight Challenger Reports He Still Has Three Days to Figure Out How to Throw a Right Hand

GRID IRON..in a sharp blow to the Pittsburgh Steelers post season hopes, safety Troy Polamalu has ruled himself out of Thursday’s game against the Cleveland Browns and also, possibly the rest of the season. Polamalu, a vital cog on the teams 2007 and 2008 number 1 ranked defence, has watched the famed Steeler resolve crumble [...]

Tuesday, December 8th, 2009

Nay, Sir!; Foxy Knoxy Neither a Murderess Nor a Tramp (But Please, Honey, Let’s Clean Up After Potty Time)

ICE..a Toronto Maple Leaf fan could perhaps be forgiven for watching last night’s game and imagining a starting line-up next year with Ilya Kovalchuk anchoring the top line and Nazim Kadri leading the second. Sweet Dreams, indeed…frustrated Ottawa Senators owner Eugene Melnyk called on his star players to play in a manner commensurate with their paystubs. Without [...]

Monday, December 7th, 2009

Shine On You Crazy Diamond; Theo’s Biography Brings the Insanity

I was battling a weird flu slash cold thing for the past few days but did manage to polish off Theo Fleury’s autobiography. The book is the best seller in Canada at the moment, largely due to the well publicized allegations of abuse against former coach Graham James. Fleury deals with the abuse in a [...]

Thursday, December 3rd, 2009

NASCAR Drivers Don’t Need A Washroom Break or Why I Stay Away From Victory Lane

THE BASKET..is there anyone in T Dot slavishly devoted to the belief that Chris Bosh is staying at the conclusion of this abominable season? And honestly now, wouldn’t you lose respect for him if he did?…Hedo Turkoglu has been getting severely criticised for his poor performance as a Raptor. I can’t help but think back to Bill Simmons [...]

Wednesday, December 2nd, 2009

Leaf Shutout Has Hearts A Flutter

Condemnation of Tiger Woods erratic and dangerous recent behaviour continues to pour in.
Mike Tyson, in a statement to the Associated Press, recalled treasured moments of his childhood spent cracking fire hydrants open at 2am. “In reality it chilled my blood to imagine Tiger ploughing into a fire hydrant at that time. In Bed-Stuy kids and [...]

Tuesday, December 1st, 2009

Hockey World Stunned as Ballard Proclaims, “Vokoun Lets In Another Bad Goal and I’ll Whack Him Again”

ICE..Florida Panther Keith Ballard’s inadvertent swipe at goalie Tomas Vokoun must be seen to be believed. After Vokoun surrenders a breakaway goal to Atlanta Thrasher Ilya Kovalchuk, a frustrated Ballard moves to smash his stick over the crossbar. Problem is, the world class tool had his goalie between his stick and the pipe, resulting in [...]